Protected: Pick Up Lines for Guys
And the winner is “you have beautiful lips”
A new survey just released shows that praising a woman on her lips is the best way to enter her heart. I hope the single African guys who need a little help in the romance department might add this to their pick up lines.
The site (badoo) which conducted the survey has 87 million registered users. The survey analyzed the success rates of opening lines from nearly 200,000 online flirtations in 11 languages.
The sites members were asked to use one of 12 different ice-breakers, each complimenting a woman on a characteristic of her body or appearance. Success was determined by 1) prompting any response and 2) launching a conversation.
And the winner is … “You have beautiful lips.”
Even though the beautiful lips compliment was successful across all countries, some compliments did better in some countries than others. For instance, for
- American, Australian and Brazilian women: Tell her how beautifully she dresses.
- Spaniards: Compliment her hair.
- Germans and Canadians: Tell her her skin is perfect
- If she’s Dutch or Portuguese, concentrate on the ears. According to the survey, they liked: “You have beautiful ears.”
- Sweden – – – “You have a beautiful figure”
- Poland: It’s all about the arms. Just say “You have beautiful arms”
African women were not represented in the survey. In any case, if you’re not sure what the woman will appreciate most, just stick to the lips; it works for all of them. It will surely work for the African woman.
If you want to graciously share your personal experience with African women, the space below is yours. Go ahead.[ad#Adsense-200by200sq]
Surviving as an International student: Friendship and Dating
This is Part 3 of our series ‘Surviving as an International Student’. Today, we cover Friendship and Dating. We hope that African students studying abroad and those contemplating doing so may find these materials useful
Your first weeks as an international student will be ones of adjustment and you may experience culture shock.
The people you pass may smile, say, “Hello, how are you?” and keep walking past you. People might not know where your country is located. What have you gotten yourself into?
You may have to weave yourself into the society as soon as you can in order to enjoy your life. You may encounter difficulties in several areas and the extent will depend on whether you’re single or married: In Part 3 of the series Surving as an International Student, we will discuss Friendship and Dating
Friendship: Most people you will come in contact with will be friendly, however international students often remark that while Westerners are “polite”, they can appear to be distant or cold. The best way to strike up a conversation is to talk about the weather since it is seen as an important aspect of the society. This probably sounds strange, but the longer you’re here, the more sense it will make.
Dating: Dating is developing a romantic relationship with someone. Dating is common among students; however, no one can force you to date or go out with him/her against your will. Also, going on a date does not mean consenting to have sex; it just means that you are interested in spending time with the person. Friendships between people of the opposite-sex are common and are not necessarily dating and it is important to respect this boundary where it exists. Rather than assume that you are in a relationship or that one has consented to an act, always ask questions for clarifications. Be also aware that NO means NO. If someone is not interested in having a sexual relationship with you, pursuing it could have serious legal consequences such as sexual harassment or assault charges.
Traditionally men have taken the initiative in asking women on dates, but this is changing as women are asserting their equal status in society. Common dating events include dinners, concerts, movies, and plays. If you want to know someone better, you might ask the person to join you for coffee or a lunch; such meetings can provide the beginning of an enduring friendship without the pressure of being a “date.” It used to be the practice that the one who invited a person on a date would pay for any expenses incurred (such as the dinner check or the ticket price). It is becoming more common for people on a date to “go Dutch,” which means that each person pays for his or her own expenses.
In some cultures, if a woman agrees to spend an evening with a man, it is assumed automatically that ‘it will happen’. In the West, making this assumption and following it up with some premature actions can bring your academic career to a miserable end. You may even have to do some time in jail.
As far as dating and romantic relationships are concerned, if in doubt, the first thing to do is to Ask, the second thing to do is to Ask, and the third again is just Ask.
Enjoy your studies
(These are materials extracted from several student bulletins and academic sources mixed with my personal thoughts. If you would like to continue to the series ‘Surviving as an International Student’, please email info@talkafrique.com)
Interracial relationship: My personal experience
By Belinda Walker.
Hello,
You posted an article about a week about African women not seeing colors in love and therefore going for interracial dating and marriage. Much as I agree with the article and the fact the world has moved beyond race, I would like to point at that it is not that easy. It is very important that our brothers and sisters think very carefully about the challenges in interracial relationship before they get into it. I’ve have been in such a relationship before. Though let me say that we broke up not because of any racial issues but some of the usual issues in relationships. Some of the problems that I encountered over the 2 years I was in the relationships are listed below:
· People within my community were not accepting the relationship. They always though we were just having fun and not really serious even when we had communicated every intentions that we meant it.
· I constantly heard indirect comments that were uncomfortable; I was stared at my friends and his friends and family.
· In fact sometimes sometime when we went to the restaurant, the restaurant staff will not just acknowledged the two of us as a party or or that we are together. Do I always have to explain to people that we’re couples? What the S&^%t..
· I had some family and friends keeping their distance, even though my guy was warm towards everyone
I’m not trying to say that everything was that bad. I’m just trying to say that everybody must weight him or herself and ask whether he or she can swallow some of these stuff. There are benefits and personal growth if you can work it out. In my case, I had the opportunity to learn about the guys interracial culture or and I was exposed to new ways of thinking. Again just knowing that you are with this person because you love him for who he his was just an incredible. Hei, I also picked a words and phrases from a new language.
By the way, I enjoy reading your blog.
Scared of dating today’s younger African women? Try these.
By Bola Omotosho
Dating a younger woman can be fun and exciting. Just remember there is a fine line between that great older man who just gets her and that creepy guy at the end of the bar every woman in the place is carefully avoiding. To give her the right impression, try following these simple tips.
Be yourself: You are who you are and you know who that is, so be proud of it. There is no need to act like one of her friends the same age. She will know you are a fake and worse, so will you.
Do not try to buy her attentions: Buying her a drink to let her know you’re interested or taking her to dinner to get to know her better is one thing, but buying fancy gifts or showing off your car, house or other material objects is not how to win her affections. Doing that will only leave you broken hearted and with an empty wallet.
Try to understand her: Younger women usually want excitement in their lives. If you are going to be part of her life, you will probably spend your nights in clubs with her friends. She will expect you to dance with her and have a good time, and not be a wall flower or just hang by your drink at their table.
This is going to seem contradictory, but it isn’t: While we just said not to buy her fancy gifts, and we mean that, that does not mean do not buy her gifts. Be reasonable and fun with them. Send her a bouquet of flowers or balloons to her work place with a sweet note. If you know she loves a certain chocolate, buy her a box for a small occasion or no occasion at all, but save those expensive, showy gifts for the important dates and super special occasions.
Show your maturity by staying calm when she is upset: This does not mean that you are supposed be unemotional, but rather that you stay in control of your emotions, especially when it has nothing to do with your relationship. For example, she may get upset that her best friend was cheat on, but your best bet is to listen and be supportive; only offering advice when asked for.
Do not be a creep: Younger women generally date older men because older men have more self control that their younger counterparts. Prove this to her by keeping your hands to yourself and allowing her to start the physical side of your relationship. No one likes that creepy older guy whose hands are everywhere at once.
Let her have some freedom: You may want to spend every waking moment with your younger beauty, but many younger women are out on their own for the first time and are just discovering the freedom that being an adult offers. Be understanding of this and let her have her girls nights, spa days, and shopping trips. She may not say how she appreciates it, but she will show you.
Let inform her on time for a date: She may enjoy hanging out with her friends with you, but every once in a while take charge of the relationship. Depending on where your relationship is, take the time and plan out a nice night on the town for just the two of you or a quiet weekend away from it all. Just be sure to ask her ahead of time and let her know that you will be making plans for the two of you then or you may be disappointed that she has already filled her time.
Be prepared to be spontaneous: I know that sounds a bit weird, but younger women sometimes hear an idea and decide that they want to do it now and want you to do it with them. That means that you have to be ready to say yes to them and go with the flow and have fun.
Lastly, do not ignore your obligations: While going out and having fun is a great thing, as an older man you have obligations in your life. The most notable is probably your job, which keeps you in the nice older man column and out of the unemployed creep column for most women. If you need to stay in to work on a project, say so. She may be initially disappointed but will respect you in the long run.